{"id":68942,"date":"2024-02-26T16:22:16","date_gmt":"2024-02-26T09:22:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/alternatech.net\/?p=68942"},"modified":"2024-02-26T16:22:16","modified_gmt":"2024-02-26T09:22:16","slug":"the-cia-has-three-candidates-for-one-assassin-position","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/the-cia-has-three-candidates-for-one-assassin-position\/","title":{"rendered":"The CIA has three candidates for one assassin position"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style='\"font-size:'>On the final day of testing, the CIA proctor leads the first male candidate to a large steel door and hands him a gun.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cWe must know that you will follow our instructions, regardless of the circumstances,\u201d he explains.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cInside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her.\u201d\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'>The man is horrified, <strong>\u201cYou can\u2019t be serious! I could never shoot my wife!\u201d\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cWell,\u201d says the proctor,<strong> \u201cyou\u2019re definitely not the right man for this job then.\u201d\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'>The CIA proctor leads the second male candidate to another large steel door and hands him a gun.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cWe must know that you will follow instructions, no matter what the circumstances,\u201d the proctor explains.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cInside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her.\u201d\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'>The second man steadies himself, takes the gun and enters the room.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'>After three quiet minutes, the man exits the room with tears in his eyes.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cI wanted to do it I just couldn\u2019t pull the trigger and shoot my wife.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>I guess I\u2019m not the right man for the job.\u201d\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'>Finally, the CIA proctor leads the female candidate to yet another large steel door and hands her a gun.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cWe must be sure that you will follow instructions, no matter what the circumstances.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>Inside this room, you will find your husband sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill him.\u201d\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'>The woman takes the gun, enters the room, and before the door even closes completely behind her, she\u2019s fired off six shots.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'>Then all hell breaks loose behind the door cursing, screaming, crashing.\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'>Suddenly, all goes quiet. The door opens slowly, the woman exits, and wiping the sweat from her brow, she says,\n<p><span style='\"font-size:'><strong>\u201cDid you guys know the gun was loaded with blanks? I had to beat the son of a bit**h to death with the chair!\u201d\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>On the final day of testing, the CIA proctor leads the first male candidate to a large steel door and hands him a gun. \u201cWe must know that you will follow our instructions, regardless of the circumstances,\u201d he explains. \u201cInside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":68943,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"On the final day of testing, the CIA proctor leads the first male candidate to a large steel door and hands him a gun...","_seopress_robots_index":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[676],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-68942","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-jokes"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/02\/The-CIA-has-three-candidates-for-one-assassin-position.png","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/68942","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/11"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=68942"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/68942\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/68943"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=68942"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=68942"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/legendstitch.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=68942"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}</p></strong></span></p></span></p></span></p></span></p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></span></p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></span></p></span></p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></span></p></strong></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></strong></span></p></span></p>